There is no battle; There’s only you fighting yourselfchritstconsciousness2012

Well, freakin yeah, that’s what I’m talkin about!

In order to go through life in a completely different direction. One requires themselves to suspend their known reality. All their past, needs to not exist in order to allow for a new reality to take hold.

The thing is, building a new reality is a delicate scenario. Repitition is very important because all we know is everything we’ve experienced and lived and learned over and over again and again.

This becomes our sustained and supported reality of what we know and what we are and have become in our lives.

I don’t have to tell you why you need to change, if you’re reading this then you have a prompting to change, an inner propencity to seek change even if everything in your being is saying “NO Don’t Change!”

That’s that part of us fighting ourselves.

Some call it EGO, some call it our inner demon. None of that matters.

A Force of Will:

Edgar Cayce, the world reknown intuitive is sited saying that the individual’s Own Personal Will is the most powerful thing at their command.

To this day, there is a debate, questioning the actual legitimacey of this very statement.

Is our Will our own, Do we truly have Free Will.

I submit to you this:

You know not your own Will.
Your Will to you is estranged.
You go forth and you succeed of your own accord not recognizing the very force you emplore. You train, learn and accomplish much because you worked hard or intentionalised the outcome.

Yet if asked to change a bad habit, remove a character defect, reduce your short commings. You have no clue where to begin.

Yet the very power you’ve engaged in the past is at your beck and call to this day. Yet we know it not.


We’ve not given ourselves to know ourselves.

I know life has to change. I know I’ve reinvented myself so many times I hardly know who I am anymore, nor do I know who I am to be next in order to be the change.

But, life has to change regardless.

Every fiber in my being yells;

“NO! Don’t Do It! This is what THEY want you to do! They want you to conform, they want you to be part of the SYSTEM! THEY want you to become a statistic!”

Yet, in order to make the change, changes must be made. Do I listen to the fibers and do I continue doing what I’m doing getting what I’m getting?

Or, do I recognize the resistance. Label it, accept it and own it?

It’s only a pattern. It can’t hurt me, well, that might be debateable depending on the perspective. It can take me hostage if I allow it to dictate my course of direction.

It’s not laziness, it’s a pattern, a habit, a release of control. It’s an escape from engaging my own Free Will.

Change requires recognition, acceptance, a decision, and a commitment combined with dicipline.

Suspending reality is not easy. A leap of faith is not easy. Stepping into the unknown out of our comfort zone is not easy. All of these things are incredibly SIMPLE, but not easy.

Here’s an example of what’s possible. I love the guitar. I can’t play as well as I would like and I’ve never got past amature status. I put down playing since I was in my early twenties because (well, the reason is inconsequential).

I’ve picked it back up and decided I wanted to learn lead guitar and not work so hard on playing rythym. I knew all along anyone worth their salt, knew the notes on the fretboard. They knew what they were and where to find them.

This has always mystified me.

I was battered with intimidating questions like, how long did they take to learn that, how do they practice that, and when did it just click for them? I fought this thing for months if not the last year or so.

I looked at the fretboard and was repelled at the notion of learning all the notes…

After all there are tons of them all over the place, how do you take all that in?

I watched video after video, I knew the names of the strings but I couldn’t for the life of me tell you where a single note was.

I asked my God to just make it happen. Let me just “GET IT” let me know where everything is. And one day last week it just clicked.

My subconscious took over and filled in the blanks of my consciousness.

As an aside;
(It’s similar to the way writers hit various subjects. They pour over material related to the subject for days, then they stop it all and take a break for a day or so. They come back and a flood of ideas, solutions and direction come to their consciousness as if from no where.)

But let me continue…

I understood it in a very simplistic manner. I knew my ABC’s and I knew the names of the strings. I knew there were spaces between every note except for B&C – E&F.

So, ABCDEFG, turned into A_BC_D_EF_G

That was it. I don’t know the fretboard by heart, but I now know how to find the notes all over the fretboard. The rest is practice and commitment. I know, its still gobbly-gook to you, but to me it was a revelation.

I intentionalized KNOWING the fretboard, I visualized knowing where everything was. I pounded my senses with videos explaining in different ways how to memorize the fretboard.

I didn’t just ask and it just happened. I fed my conscious with the data and THEN asked for it to happen, and it did.

I was tired of fighting the intimidation of the fretboard. I knew I could grasp this thing. I focused on it for a day or two and it just clicked.

Big freakin deal Dan! What does that do for the BIG changes I need to achieve?


When I was addicted to crack cocain and all kinds of other drugs and alcohol for thriteen years, breaking that habit was done by way of the same principal.

Now, I think THAT’s a pretty big change to achieve. To this day I’ve been off all that stuff for twenty five years. It was NOT easy in the beginning, it was simple. It was not easy.

I’m not telling you to join a program or go to meetings. I’m saying you can use the power of your Free Will to exact change in your life. You can stop fighting yourself and fighting your inner demons.

I let go, I knew I could, which was the opposite of “I’ll never get this”. I suspended belief of my known reality.
I asked for help. and I let it happen.
And it did.

So… “Change requires recognition, acceptance, a decision, and a commitment combined with dicipline.”

Like I said earlier, I’m using this today to reinvent myself. To change into something that works instead of going through the motions and being beaten down by life.

I recognized this is an issue. Simple.

I accept it needs to be changed and I’m not downing on myself about having to change or the issue at hand. Neither is useful information at this time because its already been accepted. Simple.

I’ve decided to change. This requires no action on my part. That comes later. I’ve only made a conscious decision to change. Simple.

I’m making a commitment. Now I’ve done it.
I’ve stepped into a world of poop, I’ve suspended reality of the past of everything I’ve known. I’ve said goodbye to all the that I’ve learned, experienced and taken the first step into a new life. Simple.

Not easy, but simple.

My dicipline is to apply all these everyday.
To ask for help when I don’t feel like doing these. And to continue in the face of doubt and fear. Everyday, every hour, every minute. And when I derail, catch myself as quickly as possible and get back on the tracks unquestioningly. Continue suspending belief of the known reality of my past. Stepping into unknown territory. Again, simple, not easy, but simple.

Kind of exciting actually.

By the way, a few weeks ago I was diagnosed having only three months to live. Another heart doctor refuted the claim. Both are reveared in their field. Regardless, from here out its a new day for me everyday.

My new motto is “I’m not here forever”


SWTRadio-Silent Suffering

A touching perspective on what happens when life comes at you fast